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To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 5 Dec 18 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, must, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs |

We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions: 1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why’s? in everyday speech? 2 What is the difference between “task-perfection” and “self-perfection.” 3. Can we be motivated without . . .   2,459 total views, 3 views today […]

2,459 total views, 3 views today

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I need you too much already, lah! :o{

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 4 Dec 18 in Demanding, Dire need for love & approval, Needs vs. Preferences, Uncategorized |

I need you too much already, lah!  Well, that is they way we might say it in Thailand or other Southeast Asian countries.  But in spite of the charming local syntax, I reckon that the irrational belief that drives this sentiment is very nearly universal.  Taken to the the extreme, and combined in a cocktail of other […]

2,826 total views, 5 views today

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It’s official! “Awfulize” is now a word!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 25 Nov 18 in Anger, Awfulizing, Awfulzing, Basics, Demanding, Demanding, Emotions, Low Frustration Tolerance, must |

Dr. Ellis coined the term “awfulize” by transforming the adjective “awful” into a verb. The language of REBT can sometimes sound a little contorted, especially when employing “ePrime,” in it’s preference for  using more verbs and adverbs than nouns and adjectives.  Now, it is official! “Awfulizing” has made it to the big time and is […]

702 total views, 1 views today

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Can Suicide ever be a rational act?

In light of recent events in the news and some of the lovely stuff that Jimmy and Steve posted here recently, I thought it might be appropriate to talk a little about suicide. First of all, if you are thinking about killing yourself or are having thoughts about harming yourself that are scaring you, pick […]

2,991 total views, 2 views today

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Are opinions incompatible with REBT-CBT?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 13 Nov 18 in Acceptance, Demanding, Events, Rating, ULA, UOA, USA |

 Are opinions incompatible with REBT???    What do you think? 679 total views, no views today Originally posted 2013-04-20 18:13:40.

679 total views, no views today

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How do we manage “job burnout”?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 30 Sep 18 in Demanding, Demanding, Depression, job burn out, Low Frustration Tolerance, Perfectionism |

A reader asks about managing job burnout What a great topic! There is an expectation that has become common since the 1960’s that work is “supposed” to be fulfilling, satisfying, fun, even meaningful . . .  5,517 total views, 1 views today Originally posted 2013-06-25 02:53:25.

5,517 total views, 1 views today

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I NEED love! (not!)

valentine, love, romance, mating, dating, needs, preferences, disguised shoulds, musts

768 total views, no views today

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Guest Author, Dr. Edelstein : Negative emotions come from one type of irrational thinking

REBT (according to Ellis) posits that inappropriate negative emotions come from one type of irrational thinking . . . 1,017 total views, no views today Originally posted 2013-12-27 06:34:31.

1,017 total views, no views today

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MUST I have what I want?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 21 Sep 18 in Demanding, Demanding, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs |

Hi REBT-mates! Do you believe that when you want something, you absolutely MUST have it . . . and that it is terrible when you don’t get what you must have? 440 total views, 1 views today Originally posted 2016-05-09 02:14:28.

440 total views, 1 views today

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How to deal with a hen-pecking boss

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 21 Sep 18 in Awfulzing, Basics, Books & Media, Demanding, job burn out, What is REBT - CBT? |

  Boss Mr. Dithers bullies employee Dagwood”Blondie” comic strip King Features Syndicate Does the usual advice for improved communications skills and more assertiveness help us to deal with a boss who bullies? 2,342 total views, 1 views today Originally posted 2016-03-11 21:21:31.

2,342 total views, 1 views today

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