Self-help forms.

Willie T has been making some interesting comments about whether REBT is “talk therapy” or something else. He shares some additional information which hits on a sore spot of mine–mechanically filling out forms–and is worth exploring in greater depth.  Here’s Willie.  We’ve taken the liberty of running the SpellCheck for him.  Hehehe . . .

 

Willie T sez :  Due to a strange twist of events, I kind of fell into facilitating a class on RET instruction some 24 years ago, and that continued right through the change to REBT.

About all all the reading our groups got were the “Nutshell”, and “Mrs. P”… and the “talk” time centered mainly around understanding terms and refining immediate awareness. Naturally, we often found ourselves too hooked up on the technicalities of creating the form, and it took a lot of “talking” to get real on emotions vs reactions.  But it did always seem that it was more thinking for themselves that helped see advancements, rather than a lot of discussion.”

 

Rex Sez: Some people, not necessarily those just learning REBT, have the stubborn  impression that doing REBT is akin to solving a Rubik’s Cube; just find the right algorithm of colors and !!! Poof !!!  Everything falls into place. You understand all,  your neurosis is dissolved on the spot!

Cool, huh?  The problem is it rarely if ever works that way.  REBT is NOT about filling out forms and is not about solving Rubik’s Cubes or any other puzzles.  REBT is about changing beliefs. When you really change a belief, you will know it, by gawd! A belief changed is a belief changed and you immediately begin feeling better, find it make much easier to make rational, healthy choices and decisions while allows you to behave in ways which get you more of what you want and less of what you do not want.

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While we obviously have to use intellect to do good disputing, REBT is NOT an “intellectual exercise.”  It works best when wet. See my recent post about “getting up and stomping around” when you are doing your disputing.  Sure, forms are helpful, but don’t lose sight of what you are trying to accomplish:  Identify, uproot, dispute and replace your nutty thinking that is making you miserable and behave in self-defeating ways.

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Originally posted 2014-05-12 07:26:10.