What is REBT?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 27 Mar 18 in Acceptance, Basics, Guilt & Shame, Happiness, Rating, ULA, UOA, USA, What is REBT - CBT? |

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Rational Emotive
Behavior Therapy
What the hell is it, anyway???

Click the blue  link below  for Will Ross’s excellent, easy-to-follow explanation . . .

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Originally posted 2013-03-27 18:01:44.

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Call for Guest Authors and Contributing Writers

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 5 Jan 18 in Announcements |


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Do anti-depressant medications work?

Pills PNG

We have been having a fascinating discussion that I reckon is best framed as “Do anti-depressant medications work?”  It would be witless to try to have a credible discussion here about the science.  But we don’t need to delve too deeply into the science when the semantics of the question is so much more compelling and revealing.  Starting out with the question framed in this way, there is little hope in ending up with anything more than babel.

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Originally posted 2013-08-06 19:00:08.


Mindfulness Meditation & REBT (?)

Posted by Rex Alexander on Mon 20 Aug 18 in john kabat-zinn, meditation, Mindfulness |
jkz_preferred_headshot_300px.jpg (240×300)Most people don't realize that the mind constantly chatters. And yet, that chatter winds up being the force that drives us much of the day in terms of what we do, what we react to, and how we feel.
Jon Kabat-Zinn, mindfulness author, founder of mindfulness based stress reduction.

REBT Mates, click the link below to join the discussion and tell us about your experience with mindfulness meditation.  How does this fit into REBT-CBT for you?

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Originally posted 2017-06-17 20:35:14.

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Avoid shoulds, oughts, musts!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Mon 20 Aug 18 in Demanding, Demanding, Homework, must, musty thinking, Should |


Avoid using moralistic, absolutist “shoulds”, “oughts”, “musts”, et al. We don’t want to be rigid and dogmatic in this (and in all things). While keeping in mind there are perfectly innocuous uses of “should”, “ought”, “must”, it is nonetheless an excellent discipline to make the effort to avoid them, and to monitor yourself using these terms, whether directed at others or yourself. Then, when you notice that you have used one of these terms, practice replacing it with something less demanding. For example

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Originally posted 2018-06-06 18:05:14.

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“Happy For Life” new Will Ross book

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 19 Aug 18 in Basics, Books & Media, Uncategorized |

HappyForLife2Will’s new book(let) “Happy For Life:Ten Key Strategies” reduces REBT to it’s essentials 

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Originally posted 2014-06-05 18:48:43.


Get up! Stomp around! Do your disputing aloud!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 19 Aug 18 in ABC Technique, Basics, Disputing, REBT & Other therapies compared |

 This is a follow-up to my post from last month What if you only understand your REBT process intellectually?”

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Originally posted 2013-12-07 04:07:02.


Acceptance is not love!


Your Opinion Matters

"Acceptance is not love. You love a person because he or she has lovable traits, but you accept everybody just because they're alive and human."

~Albert Ellis

 This is one of the premises of REBT-CBT that often confuses and pisses off people.  It is closely related to the irrational belief / IB that one absolutely must have love and love oneself (so called "self esteem")  in order to be happy. 

What do you think it means?

Share you thoughts and comments! Please help to keep our blog dynamic and organic by sharing your comments below. Agree? Disagree? How do you interpret this statement? Do you think it affects the way you practice and apply REBT-CBT?


2,389 total views, 0 views today

Originally posted 2013-05-02 07:39:44.



Tyrany of the Shoulds

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sat 18 Aug 18 in Demanding, musterbation, musty thinking |

In recent discussion, Amanda said :

Going out for dinner is a choice, bleeding monthly is not, it should be covered by our healthcare”

The problem here is . . .

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Originally posted 2017-01-23 04:52:14.


Dire need for love and approval . . .

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 17 Aug 18 in Dire need for love & approval, Guest Author |

It is always a privilege to hear from Dr. Gunars Neiders. Here is his response from the REBT-CBT Forum Yahoogroup to a member struggling with what Dr. Ellis coined as a “Dire need for love and approval.”

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Originally posted 2017-08-10 23:12:37.

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To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions:

1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why's? in everyday speech?

2 What is the difference between "task-perfection" and "self-perfection."

3. Can we be motivated without . . .

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Originally posted 2013-02-25 23:01:10.

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I need you too much already, lah! :o{

Posted by Rex Alexander on Thu 16 Aug 18 in Demanding, Dire need for love & approval, Needs vs. Preferences, Uncategorized |

I need you too much already, lah!   sad broken heart

Well, that is they way we might say it in Thailand or other Southeast Asian countries.  But in spite of the charming local syntax, I reckon that the irrational belief that drives this sentiment is very nearly universal.  Taken to the the extreme, and combined in a cocktail of other irrational beliefs, it leads to homicide, suicide and other unfortunate and destructive behavior.

2,569 total views, 0 views today

Originally posted 2013-08-01 18:17:04.

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