Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 10 Sep 19 in Anger, Demanding, Uncategorized | ∞

People and things do not upset us. Rather, we upset ourselves by believing that they can upset us.” ~Albert Ellis 74 total views, 4 views today

74 total views, 4 views today

Tags: anger, demanding, demands, must, ought, rebt, should

Disguised “Should” statments

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 18 Aug 19 in Disguised shoulds, musterbation, musty thinking, ought, should statements, Why? questions | ∞

REBT Mates, it may have been yours truly who coined the term “disguised shoulds.” Click to find out why . . . 1,701 total views, 2 views today Originally posted 2017-01-30 21:19:36.

1,701 total views, 2 views today

Tags: demanding, demands, disguised shoulds, must, musterbation, musty thinking, ought, should

How to stop being offended by every little thing

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 9 Aug 19 in Awfulizing, Demanding, Ellis Four Irational Processes, Low Frustration Tolerance, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, People Rating | ∞

The world would be a better place if everyone stopped being offended by every little thing.” 1,680 total views, 3 views today Originally posted 2016-06-18 09:45:44.

1,680 total views, 3 views today

Tags: anger, demands, healthy emotions, manipulation, manufactured outrage, must, offended, offense, oughts, shouds

Is “should” ever necessary?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 6 Aug 19 in Albert Ellis, Awfulizing, Awfulzing, Demanding, Ellis Four Irational Processes, General Semantics, Needs vs. Preferences, People Rating, Rating, Rational living, Uncategorized | ∞

A faithful reader asks What’s the best response to “I should have ______ (done x y z more) and if I had, things would be different now”? Thank you.” Ah, yes! Our “Darling Shoulds!” How we resist relinquishing them! As if they were some jewel more precious than diamonds! 😉 6,460 total views, 2 views today Originally […]

6,460 total views, 2 views today

Tags: absolutes, demanding, demands, must, musterbation, ought, should

I need you too much already, lah! :o{

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 26 Jul 19 in Demanding, Dire need for love & approval, Needs vs. Preferences, Uncategorized | ∞

I need you too much already, lah! Well, that is they way we might say it in Thailand or other Southeast Asian countries. But in spite of the charming local syntax, I reckon that the irrational belief that drives this sentiment is very nearly universal. Taken to the the extreme, and combined in a cocktail of other […]

3,306 total views, no views today

Tags: desires, love, must, need, needs, ought, should, wants

To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 23 Jul 19 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, must, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs | ∞

We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions: 1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why’s? in everyday speech? 2 What is the difference between “task-perfection” and “self-perfection.” 3. Can we be motivated without . . . 2,970 total views, 2 views today […]

2,970 total views, 2 views today

Tags: achievement, demanding, demands, must, musterbation, musty thinking, ought, self-perfection, should, success, task-perfection

Tyrany of the Shoulds

Posted by Rex Alexander on Thu 6 Jun 19 in Demanding, musterbation, musty thinking | ∞

In recent discussion, Amanda said : Going out for dinner is a choice, bleeding monthly is not, [therefore] it should be covered by our health care” 1,221 total views, no views today Originally posted 2017-01-23 04:52:14.

1,221 total views, no views today

Tags: demands, must, ought, should

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 10 May 19 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, Your Opinion Matters | ∞

Masturbation is good and delicious. Musterbation is evil and pernicious! ~Albert Ellis, PhD Dr. Ellis sometimes used vulgarity and scandalous language . . . 2,230 total views, no views today Originally posted 2013-05-24 18:48:47.

2,230 total views, no views today

Tags: demanding, demands, ellis, masturbation, must, musterbation, musty thinking, ought, should

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TRIGGER WARNING!!! People, places and things "out there" do not trigger you. You trigger yourself by your distorted interpretations of the trigger. Of course, to understand that, you first need to understand something about REBT-CBT (Building on the original quote by Dr. Ellis)Rex Alexander
REBTraining coach, author, founder REBTinfo.com
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Disguised “Should” statments

How to stop being offended by every little thing

Is “should” ever necessary?

I need you too much already, lah! :o{

To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

Tyrany of the Shoulds

Search this site

Quotes That Matter

Sticky Posts

Regular Columns & Features

Recent Comments

Categories

USEFUL LINKS

Amazon Associate Member

Disclosure

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Privacy Policy

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Disclaimer

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This is a public blog