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It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to . . .

  Lesley Gore It’s My Party (1965) REBT Mates! We have been having an lively discussion about  and adult  who behaves with emotional immaturity such as avoiding attending a party for fear of seeing a rival there as a teenager might. 2,815 total views, 1 views today Originally posted 2013-08-15 02:19:55.

2,815 total views, 1 views today

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Can Suicide ever be a rational act?

In light of recent events in the news and some of the lovely stuff that Jimmy and Steve posted here recently, I thought it might be appropriate to talk a little about suicide. First of all, if you are thinking about killing yourself or are having thoughts about harming yourself that are scaring you, pick […]

3,358 total views, 46 views today

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A loyal reader asks about managing job burnout What a great topic! There is an expectation that has become common since the 1960’s that work is “supposed” to be fulfilling, satisfying, fun, even meaningful . . .  6,245 total views, 5 views today Originally posted 2013-06-25 02:53:25.

6,245 total views, 5 views today

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It’s official! “Awfulize” is now a word!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 7 Aug 19 in Anger, Awfulizing, Awfulzing, Basics, Demanding, Demanding, Emotions, Low Frustration Tolerance, must |

Dr. Ellis coined the term “awfulize” by transforming the adjective “awful” into a verb. The language of REBT can sometimes sound a little contorted, especially when employing “ePrime,” in it’s preference for  using more verbs and adverbs than nouns and adjectives.  Now, it is official! “Awfulizing” has made it to the big time and is […]

1,363 total views, 2 views today

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MUST I have what I want?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 2 Aug 19 in Demanding, Demanding, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs |

Hi REBT-mates! Do you believe that when you want something, you absolutely MUST have it . . . and that it is terrible when you don’t get what you must have? 684 total views, no views today Originally posted 2016-05-09 02:14:28.

684 total views, no views today

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Is keeping emotions “bottled up” dangerous?

In my callow and shallow youth, I used to subscribe to the “teapot model” of emotions.  You know, our emotional systems are like teapots with water boiling, generating steam and pressure.  If the steam does not have an outlet, or the outlet becomes overwhelmed by too much steam expanding too quickly . . . POW !!!  Explosion […]

7,040 total views, no views today

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I need you too much already, lah! :o{

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 26 Jul 19 in Demanding, Dire need for love & approval, Needs vs. Preferences, Uncategorized |

I need you too much already, lah!  Well, that is they way we might say it in Thailand or other Southeast Asian countries.  But in spite of the charming local syntax, I reckon that the irrational belief that drives this sentiment is very nearly universal.  Taken to the the extreme, and combined in a cocktail of other […]

3,276 total views, no views today

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To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 23 Jul 19 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, must, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs |

We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions: 1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why’s? in everyday speech? 2 What is the difference between “task-perfection” and “self-perfection.” 3. Can we be motivated without . . .   2,947 total views, 4 views today […]

2,947 total views, 4 views today

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Baby I Need Your Lovin’ . . . Really?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sat 20 Jul 19 in Awfulzing, Demanding, Love and Romance, Needs vs. Preferences, should statements |

Baby I Need Your Lovin’| Baby, I need your lovin’ I got to have all your lovin’ Baby, I need your lovin’ Got to have all your lovin’ ~The Four Tops, 1964      Awwwwww!  Ain’t that romantic?  Don’t that just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?     Ain’t it the truth? […]

2,858 total views, no views today

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What is the difference between healthy & unhealthy emoting?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 10 Jul 19 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, Emotions |

  When adversities happen to people, they can choose to make themselves either (1) healthfully negative, sorry and regretful and annoyed and frustrated and disappointed about the happening  or (2) unhealthfully negative . . .    1,005 total views, 1 views today Originally posted 2013-07-16 21:52:38.

1,005 total views, 1 views today

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