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Is keeping emotions “bottled up” dangerous?

In my callow and shallow youth, I used to subscribe to the "teapot model" of emotions.  You know, our emotional systems are like teapots with water boiling, generating steam and pressure.  If the steam does not have an outlet, or the outlet becomes overwhelmed by too much steam expanding too quickly . . . POW !!!  Explosion […]

5,969 total views, no views today

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How to deal with a hen-pecking boss

Posted by Rex Alexander on Thu 12 Jul 18 in Awfulzing, Basics, Books & Media, Demanding, job burn out, What is REBT - CBT? |

  Boss Mr. Dithers bullies employee Dagwood”Blondie” comic strip King Features Syndicate Does the usual advice for improved communications skills and more assertiveness help us to deal with a boss who bullies? 1,981 total views, no views today Originally posted 2016-03-11 21:21:31.

1,981 total views, no views today

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It’s official! “Awfulize” is now a word!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 6 Jul 18 in Anger, Awfulizing, Awfulzing, Basics, Demanding, Demanding, Emotions, Low Frustration Tolerance, must |

Dr. Ellis coined the term “awfulize” by transforming the adjective “awful” into a verb. The language of REBT can sometimes sound a little contorted, especially when employing “ePrime,” in it’s preference for  using more verbs and adverbs than nouns and adjectives.  Now, it is official! “Awfulizing” has made it to the big time and is […]

378 total views, 0 views today

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Is “indifference” a better option than “strong preference”?

Is “indifference”  a valid alternative to having a “strong preference”?  We have been having a lively one over that. 3,319 total views, no views today Originally posted 2013-07-17 19:12:21.

3,319 total views, no views today

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I need you too much already, lah! :o{

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 26 Jun 18 in Demanding, Dire need for love & approval, Needs vs. Preferences, Uncategorized |

I need you too much already, lah!     Well, that is they way we might say it in Thailand or other Southeast Asian countries.  But in spite of the charming local syntax, I reckon that the irrational belief that drives this sentiment is very nearly universal.  Taken to the the extreme, and combined in a cocktail of […]

2,505 total views, no views today

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Avoid shoulds, oughts, musts!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 6 Jun 18 in Demanding, Demanding, Homework, must, musty thinking, Should |

HOMEWORK Avoid using moralistic, absolutist “shoulds”, “oughts”, “musts”, et al. We don’t want to be rigid and dogmatic in this (and in all things). While keeping in mind there are perfectly innocuous uses of “should”, “ought”, “must”, it is nonetheless an excellent discipline to make the effort to avoid them, and to monitor yourself using […]

102 total views, no views today

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Guest Author, Dr. Edelstein : Negative emotions come from one type of irrational thinking

REBT (according to Ellis) posits that inappropriate negative emotions come from one type of irrational thinking . . . 615 total views, no views today Originally posted 2013-12-27 06:34:31.

615 total views, no views today

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Baby I Need Your Lovin’ . . . Really?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sat 2 Jun 18 in Awfulzing, Demanding, Love and Romance, Needs vs. Preferences, should statements |

Baby I Need Your Lovin'   Baby, I need your lovin' I got to have all your lovin' Baby, I need your lovin' Got to have all your lovin' ~The Four Tops, 1964      Awwwwww!  Ain't that romantic?  Don't that just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?     Ain't it the […]

2,240 total views, no views today

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I NEED love! (not!)

valentine, love, romance, mating, dating, needs, preferences, disguised shoulds, musts

574 total views, no views today

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Can Suicide ever be a rational act?

Sat 9 Aug 2014, 6:49 pm Good Morning All, In light of recent events in the news and some of the lovely stuff that Jimmy and Steve posted here recently, I thought it might be appropriate to talk a little about suicide. First of all, if you are thinking about killing yourself or are having […]

2,784 total views, 0 views today

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