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Is “should” ever necessary?

A faithful reader asks What’s the best response to “I should have ______  (done x y z more) and if I had, things would be different now”?     Thank you.”       Ah, yes!  Our “Darling Shoulds!”  How we resist relinquishing them!   As if they were some jewel more precious than diamonds!   😉   7,594 total views, […]

 7,594 total views,  1 views today

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Are opinions incompatible with REBT-CBT?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 24 Apr 22 in Acceptance, Demanding, Events, Rating, ULA, UOA, USA |

Are opinions incompatible with REBT???         What do you think?  1,744 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2013-04-20 18:13:40.

 1,744 total views,  1 views today

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This from an old friend from the REBT-CBT-FORUM@yahoogroups.com whom we have not heard from for a long time.  This person has been struggling with anxiety and although works diligently applying REBT-CBT techniques, does not appear to be getting much traction. Although I am not psychic, I think I may have an idea as to why. […]

 4,727 total views,  2 views today

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Why is it so wrong to want to kill yourself?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 13 Apr 22 in Acceptance, Rating, suicide |

   A reader of my lengthy post on suicide on another site responds in part “Why is it so wrong to want to move on [kill yourself]  before your natural physical body tells you to This is not expressing a view more a question for discussion”  3,288 total views Originally posted 2014-08-16 18:12:15.

 3,288 total views

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“Bad People” ???

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sat 2 Apr 22 in Emotions, Mindfulness, Rating, REBT & Other therapies compared |

Most people think here are a lot of bad people running around in the world . . .                  ~Sam Harris  1,756 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2017-08-15 21:53:26.

 1,756 total views,  1 views today

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Why “can’t” you rate the essence of a human?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 16 Mar 22 in Acceptance, ePrime, General Semantics, judgment, People Rating, Rating, Self esteem, self vs. behavior, USA |

Jane asks a very important question: Why does REBT say you cannot define or rate the essence of a human being?  . . . Click to read her full question and my reply . . .  2,370 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2013-12-15 23:16:48.

 2,370 total views,  1 views today

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What is REBT?

Posted by Will Ross on Sun 6 Mar 22 in Acceptance, Basics, Guest Author, Guilt & Shame, Happiness, Rating, ULA, UOA, USA, What is REBT - CBT? |

This post is pinned to the top. Scroll down for recent posts REBT / Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy What the hell is it, anyway??? Click the blue  link below  for Will Ross’s excellent, easy-to-follow explanation . . .  46,374 total views,  5 views today Originally posted 2013-03-27 18:01:44.

 46,374 total views,  5 views today

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Judge behavior, not self

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 1 Mar 22 in Acceptance, ePrime, Guilt & Shame, judgment, Rating, Self esteem, self vs. behavior, ULA, UOA, USA |

The long and the short of it is, however, that REBT-CBT–as do some  other modern psychological approaches and schools of psychology–encourages people to distinguish between self and behavior, and to recognize  judgments or global ratings as irrational and unhelpful, and to instead practice Unconditional Self Acceptance (USA), Unconditional Other Acceptance (UOA) and Unconditional Life Acceptance (ULA)  […]

 5,167 total views,  2 views today

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How to deal with your past errors?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Fri 17 Dec 21 in Albert Ellis, damning, downing, Ellis Quotes, People Rating, Rating, Shame, USA |

By honestly acknowledging your past errors, but never damning yourself for them, you can learn to use your past for your own future.” ~Albert Ellis    2,638 total views,  2 views today Originally posted 2017-06-17 06:21:04.

 2,638 total views,  2 views today

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Is keeping emotions “bottled up” dangerous?

In my callow and shallow youth, I used to subscribe to the “teapot model” of emotions.  You know, our emotional systems are like teapots with water boiling, generating steam and pressure.  If the steam does not have an outlet, or the outlet becomes overwhelmed by too much steam expanding too quickly . . . POW !!!  Explosion […]

 9,098 total views,  2 views today

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