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Is “should” ever necessary?

A faithful reader asks What’s the best response to “I should have ______  (done x y z more) and if I had, things would be different now”?     Thank you.”       Ah, yes!  Our “Darling Shoulds!”  How we resist relinquishing them!   As if they were some jewel more precious than diamonds!   😉   7,931 total views […]

 7,931 total views

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Should you read this?

HOMEWORK CHALLENGE Are you conscious of how and when you use the words should, must, ought, etc? Will you take the homework challenge this week?     1,311 total views Originally posted 2018-09-02 18:11:21.

 1,311 total views

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Anger Management Workbook

Posted by Rex Alexander on Mon 22 May 23 in Books & Media, bookshop |

The Anger Management Workbook: Use the  S.T.O.P.  Method to Replace Destructive Responses with Constructive Behavior    1,779 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2018-12-09 03:20:41.

 1,779 total views,  1 views today

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Tyrany of the Shoulds

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 21 May 23 in Demanding, musterbation, musty thinking |

In recent discussion, Amanda said : Going out for dinner is a choice, bleeding monthly is not, [therefore] it should be covered by our health care”    2,130 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2017-01-23 04:52:14.

 2,130 total views,  1 views today

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Whine! Whine! Whine!

Posted by Rex Alexander on Wed 17 May 23 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, must, musterbation, musty thinking, Rational Songs & Limericks, Videos |

   Dr. Ellis loved making fun of his and our distorted thinking and irrational behavior with humorous rational songs, and  limericks. Humor is, of course, fun, but also very powerful in helping us break the bonds of our irrational thinking.  Here is a special video by Dr. Ellis singing his famous “Whine! Whine! Whine!” song […]

 5,226 total views

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To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???

Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 2 May 23 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, must, musterbation, musty thinking, Needs vs. Preferences, Wants vs. needs |

We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions: 1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why’s? in everyday speech? 2 What is the difference between “task-perfection” and “self-perfection.” 3. Can we be motivated without . . .    4,770 total views,  2 views today […]

 4,770 total views,  2 views today

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How to stop being offended by every little thing

The world would be a better place if everyone stopped being offended by every little thing.”  3,382 total views Originally posted 2016-06-18 09:45:44.

 3,382 total views

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Three musts which hold us back

Posted by Rex Alexander on Mon 24 Apr 23 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, Disguised shoulds, musterbation, musty thinking, should statements |

 5,420 total views,  1 views today Originally posted 2017-06-03 04:17:41.

 5,420 total views,  1 views today

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Posted by Rex Alexander on Tue 18 Apr 23 in Books & Media, bookshop, Demanding, musterbation, Uncategorized, Videos |

Prince Ea finally admits to being a chronic musterbator! Are you one too? Click because you want to watch this amazing video and find out . . .  2,595 total views Originally posted 2019-09-20 20:37:27.

 2,595 total views

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What is the difference between healthy & unhealthy emoting?

Posted by Rex Alexander on Sun 9 Apr 23 in Albert Ellis, Demanding, Emotions |

  When adversities happen to people, they can choose to make themselves either (1) healthfully negative, sorry and regretful and annoyed and frustrated and disappointed about the happening  or (2) unhealthfully negative . . .     4,258 total views Originally posted 2013-07-16 21:52:38.

 4,258 total views

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