To achieve anything in life, you have to make it a “must” ???
We have been having a fascinating, wide-ranging discussion which I think boils down to a few basic-but-important questions: 1. Is it necessary to avoid shoulds, oughts, musts and why’s? in everyday speech? 2 What is the difference between “task-perfection” and “self-perfection.” 3. Can we be motivated without . . . Originally posted 2013-02-25 23:01:10.
How to stop being offended by every little thing
The world would be a better place if everyone stopped being offended by every little thing.” Originally posted 2016-06-18 09:45:44.
Three musts which hold us back
Originally posted 2017-06-03 04:17:41.
Can Suicide ever be a rational act?
In light of recent events in the news and some of the lovely stuff that Jimmy and Steve posted here recently, I thought it might be appropriate to talk a little about suicide. First of all, if you are thinking about killing yourself or are having thoughts about harming yourself that are scaring you, pick […]
Disguised “Should” statments
REBT Mates, it may have been yours truly who coined the term “disguised shoulds.” Click to find out why . . . Originally posted 2017-01-30 21:19:36.
MUST I have what I want?
Do you believe that when you want something, you absolutely MUST have it . . . and that it is terrible when you don’t get what you must have? Originally posted 2016-05-09 02:14:28.
The Meaning of Life
Perhaps there are such people as “pure philosophers” who placidly think about the “meaning of life” as a kind of “recreation,” and are not motivated to do so by existential angst. Originally posted 2015-03-11 05:39:27.
What, more “darling shoulds?”
It’s true! I never tire of talking about my “darling shoulds.” Originally posted 2015-03-20 05:06:07.
Avoid shoulds, oughts, musts!
HOMEWORK Avoid using moralistic, absolutist “shoulds”, “oughts”, “musts”, et al. We don’t want to be rigid and dogmatic in this (and in all things). While keeping in mind there are perfectly innocuous uses of “should”, “ought”, “must”, it is nonetheless an excellent discipline to make the effort to avoid them, and to monitor yourself using […]
Disguised shoulds?
Greta Van Susteren, former Fox News Analyst Are Greta’s “disguised shoulds” showing? We have been talking about the model of REBT where demanding (shoulds, oughts, musts, etc.) are at the root of disturbance. I thought it might be a good occasion to reprise my concept of “disguised shoulds.” Originally posted 2014-10-01 06:33:55.